Disorder	Rating
Paranoid:	Very High
Schizoid:	High
Schizotypal:	Very High
Antisocial:	High
Borderline:	Very High
Histrionic:	Very High
Narcissistic:	Very High
Avoidant:	Very High
Dependent:	Very High
Obsessive-Compulsive:	High
-- Personality Disorder Test - Take It! --

Yeah yeah, I cheated. So what.

Staind - Take It

I feel like this won't go away
no matter how hard I try
to squeeze my eyes shut
so i can't see the pain
in you - this pain in me.
In me.

But everything that I can say to you
Wont help you, everything you need is right in front of you
Just take it.

I know that I am really not here
to represent what I am not clear
about in my head. sometimes,
I feel fucked up just like you do.
Like you do.

But everything that I can say to you
Wont help you, everything you need is right in front of you
Just take it.

Try to make it through the daily pain
That you feel - maybe tomorrow won't be so bad.
I know it.

'Cause I once felt that way.
Nothing I could say.
Made it go away.
I lived through this.
I still feel this.
I just live for my tomorrow.

Make it go away
Just make it go away
She'll make it go away.

Korn - Alone I Break

Pick me up
Been bleeding too long.
Right here, right now
I'll stop it somehow.

I will make it go away
Can't be here no more.
Seems this is the only way
I will soon be gone.
These feelings will be gone.
These feelings will be gone.

Now I see the times they change
Leaving us, it seems so strange.
I am hoping I can find
Where to leave my hurt behind.
All the shit I seem to take
All alone I seem to break.
I have lived the best I can,
Does this make me not a man?

Shut me off.
I'm ready
Heart stops.
I stand alone
Can't be my own.

I will make it go away
Can't be here no more.
Seems this is the only way
I will soon be gone.
These feelings will be gone.
These feelings will be gone.

Now I see the times they change
Leaving us, it seems so strange.
I am hoping I can find
Where to leave my hurt behind.
All the shit I seem to take
All alone I seem to break.
I have lived the best I can
Does this make me not a man?

Am I going to leave this place?
What is it I'm hanging from?
Is there nothing more to come?
Is it always black in space?
Am I going take its place?
Am I going to leave this race?
I guess God's up in this place?
What is it that I've become?
Is there something more to come?

Now I see the times they change
Leaving us, it seems so strange.
I am hoping I can find
Where to leave my hurt behind.
All the shit I seem to take
All alone I seem to break.
I have lived the best I can
Does this make me not a man?

Staind - Change

If ever you had said to me before,
That I would leave this life that I am living now
I guess it's all so strange.

To feel the way I do inside
Have so much that I could feel
Some pride for in my life
So why is it that I feel like this?

How do I feel? I've been here before. I've felt this.
Retreat to a place, a place within me, I need this.
Keep it all down, all bottled inside, it breaks me.
To torment again and torture me like it used to.

I try and try to break away from all the hate
I'm feeling for every one of you that's ever done me wrong.
I need to justify the reasons for the way I'm living.
I guess I can't 'cause I don't feel like I deserve.

So now the waves they have subsided
And my soul is bleeding I can't take away the shame I feel.
Forgive me.

How do I feel? I've been here before. I've felt this.
Retreat to a place, a place within me, I need this.
Keep it all down, all bottled inside, it breaks me.
To torment again and torture me like it used to.

12 Stones - Crash

As I lie tossing in my bed,
Lost in my fears remembering what you said.
And I try to hide the truth within
The mask of myself shows its face again.
Still I lie time and time again
Will you deny me when we meet again?

And I feel like I'm falling
Farther every day.
But I know that you're there
Watching over me.
And I feel like I'm drowning
The waves crashing over me
But I know that your love
It will set me free.

As I find truth where I found it times before
As I search for your hope
I'm finding so much more
And I try to be more like you
And I deny myself to prove my heart is true.

I hear your voice calling
The time has come for me.
Inside this life I’m living
There’s nothing left for me
My mind is slowly fading
So far away from me.
Each time I start crawling
You’re there watching me.

Stone Sour - Bother

Wish I was too dead to cry,
My self-affliction fades.
Stones to throw at my creator
Masochists to which I cater.
You don't need to bother;
I don't need to be.
I'll keep slipping farther
But once I hold on,
I won't let go 'til it bleeds.

Wish I was too dead to care
If indeed I cared at all.
Never had a voice to protest
So you fed me shit to digest
I wish I had a reason
my flaws are open season
For this, I gave up trying
One good turn deserves my dying.

You don't need to bother;
I don't need to be
I'll keep slipping farther
But once I hold on,
I won't let go 'til it bleeds.

Wish I'd died instead of lived
A zombie hides my face
Shell forgottenwith its memories
Diaries left with cryptic entries.

And you don't need to bother
I don't need to be.
I'll keep slipping farther
But once I hold on,
I won't let go 'til it bleeds.

You don't need to bother,
I don't need to be.
I'll keep slipping farther
But once I hold on,
I'll never live down my deceit.

Saliva - Rest In Pieces

Look at me, my depth perception must be off again
Cause this hurts deeper than I thought it did.
It has not healed with time
It just shot down my spine.
You look so beautiful tonight
Reminds me how you laid us down,
And gently smiled before you destroyed my life.

Would you find it in your heart,
To make this go away?
And let me rest in pieces.
Would you find it in your heart,
To make this go away?
And let me rest in pieces.

Look at me, my depth perception must be off again
You got much closer than I thought you did.
I'm in your reach
You held me in your hands.

But could you find it in your heart,
To make this go away?
And let me rest in pieces.
Would you find it in your heart,
To make this go away.
And let me rest in pieces.

Would you find it in your heart,
To make this go away.
And let me rest in pieces.

12 Stones - Broken

Alone again again alone
Patiently waiting by the phone
Hoping that you will call me home
The pain inside my love denied
Hopes and dreams swallowed by pride
Everything I need it lies in you.

‘Cause I’m broken
You know I need you now.
Deep inside I'm broken
You see the way I live
I know, know your heart is broken
When I turn away
I need to be broken
Take the pain away.

I question why you chose to die
When you knew your truth I would deny
You look at me
The tears begin to fall
And all in all faith is blind
But I fail time after time
Daily in my sin I take your life.

All the hate deep inside
Slowly covering my eyes
All these things I hide
Away from you again.
All this fear holding me
My heart is cold and I believe
Nothing’s gonna change
Til I love again.

school sucks.

3 Doors Down - When I'm Gone

There's another world inside of me
That you may never see
There's secrets in this life
That I can't hide
Somewhere in this darkness
There's a light that I can't find
Maybe it's too far away..
Maybe I'm just blind.

Maybe I'm just blind.

So hold me when I'm here
Love me when I'm wrong
Hold me when I'm scared
And love me when I'm gone
Everything I am
And everything you need
I'll also be the one
You wanted me to be
I'll never let you down
Even if I could
I'd give up everything
If only for your good
So hold me when I'm here
Love me when I'm wrong
You can hold me when I'm scared
You won't always be there
So love me when I'm gone

Love me when I'm gone.

When your education x-ray
Can not see under my skin
I won't tell you a damn thing
That I could not tell my friends
Roaming through this darkness
I'm alive but I'm alone
Part of me is fighting this
But part of me is gone.

Love me when I'm gone..

Love me when I'm gone..
When I'm Gone
When I'm Gone
When I'm Gone.

sheeeeesh. no one online? at 8.30? jeez. seems like i'm the only one left home.
ah well, went biking today to upper pierce reservior.. cycled around for awhile, then sat down at some rocks, and thought over lots of stuff. i dont know. hahahaha. long time since i've stopped to really think about stuff. dint really figure out much anyway.
well, i'm back home now. typing this crap after my bath and dinner. really tired. i think i'll sleep early today. bye.

yo! back at the com again. whoooo. yesterday's jam session was quite okay, except that my amp sucked, kept overheating and cutting me off halfway, and the distorter which basically didnt give out any distortion because of the flat battery. hahaha. but still, it was cool. We jammed Kryptonite and Hate To Say I Told You So.. not that great sound from us, just missing a few rhythm brushups. i broke an electric guitar's E string too. LOL. i wanna go try it out again! think we should be able to do better after hearing the songs at home a few more times. yeah guys? =D

Yeaaaaaah. Finally going for the Jam Session today. Just finished printing all the tabs out for the bass and everything. Just hope the session turns out okay. Before that, gotta drop by school to pick up some books. catch ya later!

These are the pictures from 30/03/03 night.












pictures scanned by yuchern. thanks!


Whoo, this excuses me from blogging for a week!

there's a reason to all this.

whoooo. I'm back in blogging business again! Just came back from jiajia's house yesterday. It's really nice. I think her father is a big fan of Bang&Olufsen stuff.. hahaha. We watched 8mile and played GTA on her bro's PS2 there.. it was fun, dropping tanks everywhere and crashing through town on one. And we ate lots of chocolate and pizza, courtesy of her mom. lol. I think I kinda ate too much.
Well, today was the usual quarantine schedule of eat, sleep, online, sleep, eat, tv, online, sleep. Not much more to say I guess. dohh. BYE.

Okay, it just started raining, that explains it.

Correction, there are people online, the majority of which consists of parkers or people who have fallen asleep at their keyboard. which kinda makes no difference. ah well, at least joshua and shane is active.
hmm. I just noticed, is it just me, or is the sky looking kinda sick this morning? I mean, for a time near midday, it's looking the colour of piss. Yeah, PISS. so until the colour changes, i think i'll stick home for the time being.
saaaaave me.

Gaaaaah!!! there's NO ONE ONLINE!

whaaaao. just got back home from dinner with jiayi, vern, lb, yc and yw.. ate at pastamania, then went upstairs cos yw and yc wanted to find out what was all the noise was abt at the open plaza. turned out to be another gay band. gahahahaha. with their usual entourage of crazy, screaming, deprived females. maadness.
After that went to some remote field to fire the 7 rockets that i made at home. gahahaha. you know what. i think i'm getting better at making rockets. gonna try again on tues, if time permits. =DDD
Here's some quiz i got from yuwen's blog.

My personality is rated 30.
Others see you as fresh, lively, charming, amusing, practical, and always interesting; someone who's constantly in the center of attention, but sufficiently well-balanced not to let it go to their head. They also see you as kind, considerate, and understanding; someone who'll always cheer them up and help them out.

gaaaaaah! i should try being more evil then!!
What is yours?quiz by midgetfarm.com